Well, I did it. I got myself a job. Starting next week, I’ll be training to manage an office for a local insurance agent. I need to get my certification to sell insurance policies, but other than that, I expect the transition of working from home to working outside the home to go smoothly.
So why do I feel so anxious? Part of it is that I haven’t really worked for anyone else in over nine years. Suddenly, I’ll have to prove myself all over again. But I think the largest anxiety is caused by the change it will be to my family.
I won’t be able to pick the Lil’ Diva up from the bus stop anymore. I won’t be home when the Lil’ Princess gets off the bus at the end of the cul-de-sac. I have to trust they won’t kill each other in the thirty-five minutes it takes me to get from the office to the house.
Knowing that I’ll have some flexibility with this job is a definite plus, but what about when the kids are sick? Will I feel like I have to send them to school anyway or risk losing my job? There will be no more meeting the Lil’ Princess for lunch at school. There will be no more volunteering at school because my shift is from 10 AM – 3 PM.
Then there’s me rushing home to make sure I get a quick bite to eat before taking the Lil’ Princess off to softball practice on Wednesdays and Friday afternoons and the fear that I’ll miss some of her games or have a hard time getting the Lil’ Diva to concert practice or cheerleading tryouts.
Many years ago, when I was a single parent, I didn’t worry so much about this stuff. It was only me, so I had to work. Now, it seems like I’m throwing everyone’s schedules up in the air just to make a few bucks.
I pray I made the right choice. It’s an exciting opportunity for me. I just hope we can all adjust to the change.
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